14 weeks 4 days: good thing it's legal...

My father called last night, and proceeded to tell me the big story of his week. He and my stepmother needed a new outdoor trash can, so he went to Home Depot and bought the only one he could find. $60 for a trash can. He said there was no price tag on it, and he was so shocked at the register that he just bought it because he was too embarrassed to tell the cashier it was too expensive.

So, he brought it home, filled it up with a week's worth of nasty, kitchen food type trash and left it outside in the 100 degree weather. He wheeled it out on trash day, so proud of himself to finally have a can on wheels. The trash men came, and then they left, refusing to pick up the brand new trash can.

He called the public works number of his town, and discovered that the new trash can was too big. The legal requirements of his town is 42 gallons. He had purchased a 50 gallon trashcan. He talked to the public works administrator, who agreed to send the trash men back, as long as Dad handed the trash men the bags, rather than make the trash men lift the contraband can.

That night, he wanted to go buy a new trash can, but my stepmother said, "But we have to go babysit for the kids (my stepsister and brother-in-law) since it is their anniversary." Apparently, since my stepsister and BIL live one town offer (ostensibly without the same size requirements for trash cans), a lighbulb went off in my dad's brain, and he proceeded to put a bow on the trashcan, load it in the car, and give it to my stepsister and brother-in-law as a present.

He is still confused as to why my stepsister wasn't thrilled to receive a trashcan (with a slight stench of a week's storage of nasty trash) as an anniversary gift.

The icing on the cake of the trashcan saga is that he then told me that the trashcan wasn't so much a gift per se. It was more of a forced trade, since he insisted on taking their old trashcan, which met the legal requirements for their town.

All I can say is that it is a good thing that Dyke already put that ring on my finger, and that divorce is not possible for us since our marriage is not recognized. Otherwise, my family is way too crazy to willingly marry into.

Dyke Two and I don't have to worry. Our trashcan is also a 50 gallon can.