Monday, April 03, 2006

Stupid, stupid bureaucracy

We are still dealing with some insurance stupidity for Bigfella. It is very nerve-wracking to not have his insurance finalized, and have bills be arriving without knowing who is going to pay them or how much our co-pays are going to be. We are still waiting to hear which state-sponsored medical insurance programs for low-income families he qualifies for. Stupid state with their stupid laws against same-sex marriage, second parent adoption and domestic partner benefits. Stupid, stupid bureaucracy.

And, I decided to finally try and track down my vaccination records for student health. Stupid woman told me that the form I need isn't available yet.

Me: Really? The form on line that says that it is due by Aug 1, 2006 for fall admission is not the current form?

Stupid woman: No one told me it's on line yet, but that might be the form you need.

Stupid woman, open your stupid web browser and look. So, she said that my shot record from my last enrollment at University of Red State is not in the computer, but "off site" and asked me to call my regular doctor to see if he has it. So, I called my regular doctor, who told me I had to call URS hospital medical records.

Me: I am wondering if you have a copy of my shot record.

Stupid woman: We can't look in your file without you filling out a form.

Me: So, I need to drive across town to fill out a form so you can tell me if the information I need is available?

Stupid woman: Yes.

Me: That's really stupid.

Stupid woman: Let me give you to my supervisor.

Me: Hi, I was a student at URS before being a patient of a doctor in the system. My doctor was supposed to have requested my records when I was a new patient. Do you have a copy of my shot records?

Stupid supervisor: Did we give you the shots?

Me: No.

Stupid supervisor: Then we probably don't have them, but you could come over and fill out the form so we can look.

Yeah. A six week old and I are driving across town to a germ-filled hospital to fill out a form so that some idiot can look in my file to tell me if the information I need is in the file. I don't think so. The record clerk from student health can go "off-site" for me. Apparently, URS needs me to sign a form to release records to URS. Stupid, stupid bureaucracy.

And then our car insurance people called to ask for information about my husband.

Me: I don't have a husband.

Stupid woman: Well, your form has a second driver listed.

Me: Yes, HER name is Dyke Two, and she has a policy with you too.

(Don't even get me started that we have to have separate policies because our relationship is not legal).

Stupid woman got all confused, but thankfully, she transferred me to the agent, who laughed and said that he would just transfer her stuff to my policy and my stuff to her policy. Stupid, stupid bureaucracy.

Stupid insurance companies.

but, I do love me some pediatrician right now. Saturday I was having excruciating indigestion. Like, "is it a heart attack or indigestion?" type indigestion. I sent Dyke Two to CVS to buy me something while I lay on the couch crying. She came back with pepto bismol (but she bought the liquid, not the tablets, which pissed me off then because who wants to drink that crap when they can just chew on some tablets?) and I opened it only to then read, "If pregnant or breastfeeding, consult a health care professional." So, we looked at each other at 7:30 on a Saturday night, trying to figure out who to call. My doctor was closed. My OB was on call through the hospital. The pharmacy? The ER? Who? Then I remembered that our pediatrician is open 7 days a week, 365 days a year until 10 pm. So, I called, and thankfully, stupid woman does not moonlight at the pediatrician's office, so the triage nurse looked in her book, and didn't see anything so she called the pediatrician on call to make sure I could take my pepto. And I could. So I did.

See? No bureaucracy there. That's why I love the pediatrician.


At 5:43 PM, Blogger art-sweet said...

I wonder if there are people out there who don't know how devastating these laws are to our families? I find that easier to believe than to believe that the world is full of people who hate us.

This is why we eliminated huge swathes of the country from my partner's search for a tenure track job...


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