Wednesday, March 23, 2005

Pardon the Interruption....

Now seems as good a time as any to talk about what makes Dyke Two special and why I was ready to commit to her for the rest of my life. Dyke Two and I share a lot of commonalities in regards to professional goals and passions. We are both wholeheartedly committed to social justice and equality for all people, and our work overlaps in more ways than we can count.

In fact, it was our professional network that initially brought us together. We were both asked to serve on a panel regarding issues of sexual orientation in the schools, which gave us the opportunity to continue a conversation we had begun a few years earlier when a policy decision was made in her division that addressed bullying, discrimination and access to education.

From those initial professional conversations, personal connections soon followed. I discovered that Dyke Two, while different from the partner I envisioned for myself in so many ways, was exactly who I had been looking for. She is kind, compassionate, considerate, funny, intelligent and makes me feel alive.

She challenges me to grow further and take risks, mainly because I feel so comfortable and protected when I am with her. She provides me with a safe shelter in which to examine my own motives, needs and desires. She encourages me to move forward and never grow complacent.

She also laughs at the things I do that are funny, cries with me when I am sad, and recognizes that my fears and worries are a normal part of who I am, and will only get worse if i am forced to hide them or deny them.

When I see her with children, I see a softer, goofier side of her. She rolled around on the floor with my 3 year old nephew, and read him stories over Thanksgiving. She showed him how to use her digital camera to take pictures of the family, and then emailed him the photos he took. I had the privilege of attending a school field trip with her this fall. I watched her bring out of the high school students who were with us the same sense of being respected, valued and safe that she brings to me.

She is excited to have children, and begin the nitty gritty process of making a baby lesbian-style. Yet, whenever I begin to stress that maybe I am not ovulating, or maybe I will never get pregnant, she just smiles, and says, "that's OK. We can always adopt." Perhaps even better, I have come in the room to find her watching baby shows on TLC or Discovery Health, and have even caught her "with something in my eye" as she so stubbornly says after she wipes away the tears that have welled in her eyes.

I think that perhaps the greatest gift the two of us have received in this process so far is the knowledge that we are secure in our relationship. May we continue to be so lucky...


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