Monday, March 21, 2005

And so we wait...

We're still waiting to hear from PKD. We are going to give him until the 26th to get back to us without us pressuring him for an answer. That will have given him a two week window to discuss it with his mother and a couple of his close friends. Kind of ironic that we are currently in a different sort of 2WW than couples who have started the ball rolling with actively trying. We are both trying our hardest to remain sane and calm. Dyke Two is such a stabilizing force for me as I start to freak out, since I can watch her wait so calmly.

I was very frustrated and disappointed last week when I called the attorney the Education Association uses for it discounted rates on members' personal legal needs. The attorney is a dedicated and knowledgeable man who I know from other advocacy events and situations. He drew up my mother's will last year and did a wonderful job getting her stuff in order even with her trying to honor Dyke Two's and my relationship in the face of oppressive and discriminatory laws in our state. He was excited to help us draw up our wills, joint tenancy and power of attorney.

When I asked about parenting issues, in loco parentis and known donor contracts, he was apologetic, but said he is unable to do it because he doesn't have experience. While I appreciate his honesty, and will definitely call the lawyer he recommended, I am frustrated that a benefit that is part of the dues money I have diligently paid for 6 years is now not available to me because the attorney the Association has on retainer is not knowledgeable about my needs.

As I wait in this frustrating stall pattern, I am trying not to think too much about why we selected PKD as our first choice. Thankfully, Dyke Two recognized my fear and nervousness, and together we outlined our next plan of attack in Operation Known Donor if PKD does not work out. We have decided to approach a former student of Dyke Two's who lives in the area if PKD ends up backing out. PKD2 is a kind, funny man with a wife and young child, which means that in many ways, he is a better choice for legal reasons, as he is unlikely to ever want custody. If neither PKD nor PKD2 works out, we have also identified a former coworker of mine, PKD3, and a friend who lives out of the area, PKD4, as potential donors.

The wait continues....


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